Tag Archive: love

*Nicholas Jerry Jonas*

Nick J is just a total genius. Here’s one of the many reasons to adore him and his side-project.


Nick Jonas and The Administration

I wanna know
Am I the only one around
Can you show me something deeper then I found
I wanna know will you be with me
Everything around is falling down
When I finally get these feet back on the ground

When it comes to writing songs, he writes them with his heart, that’s Nick J.

p.s. Hey, will you be with me? I know I will always be with you.

*Faded Colors*


I have talked about Jamie a few times in my blog and those who really understand will be well-informed that he is my imaginary friend, one of my imaginary friends which I adore and love tremendously.

I am no freak but yes I do talk to Jamie even though he is one fictitious soul. I take pride by being his friend. I take refuge and find solace from my countless problems by sharing with him. He responded very well of course.

Until the day I lost my ability to see and meet him. We grew apart and I find myself unable to depict and portray his face in my mind. I don’t know what and where I did wrong. I still remember the night I dreamt of him when he decided to leave me, his wrenched face, those sad blue eyes bidding goodbye to me.

From that moment, I knew we had chosen a different path in life.Distinctive from each other. Days went by with me left baffled, trying to find the answer of this unfathomable question Jamie left me.

Everyone has and takes pleasure in something to distract themselves from their problems. They smoke, they play with their teddy bears, they drink and have sex but for me, Jamie is always the great escape.

Jamie, this fragile heart of mine here is coveting for your cheerful present. When you left, you take a part of me with you. I need that half of me back and I need you back. Please don’t shut me down.

Come home please.

p.s. I’ve always been waiting for you to come home.




The utmost guilty pleasure is back.

Joseph was spotted with a new hairdo and I am flabbergasted. The JoeHawk is back people. Another reason to love him more.

He looks way better in this, much better.

How delicious!


p.s. So I guess it’s time for a new hairdo for me too.


Saya tengah buat esaimen malam tu bila die msg saye,

“syg, can I give u a call? we need to talk”

lalu saya ponk replied,
“err orang ngah wat esaimen, besides ramai neh..nnti kalo die call camne orang nk cakap ngn u..my friends dengar nnti..lol, kenapa? text jek la eh syg”

Lama gak die nak reply, selalu camtuh, tapi saya tunggu la msg die. Geram gak sikit-sikit sebab kalaw saya yang lambat reply mesti die marah and merajuk,women sangat!Tapi tak pe, sebab saya macho saya tak nak la marah die jadi saya tunggu.

Pastu msg masuk,
“Kite putus jek la eh, orang nmpak cam die x sayang orang jek..and I think you’re not ready to be in a relationship. It’s too early for us. I know u sayang I and I’m thankful for that tapi entah la I rase u tak ready lagik..I ponk rase I x ready lagik”

Saya replied,
“oke if that’s what you want..tapi I da start sayang u..jap I sayang tol kat u taw..tapi I think you’re right..I think I’m not ready yet. Jadi cane nie? Kite jadi kawan ah dulu oke? Let things take place accordingly, sometimes we don’t need to sort things out..WAH! ayat x bleh blah!”

Die replied balik,
“errm errm okay, tapi I sayang u taw..and thank you for loving me too, at least I know someone loves me. Thanks sayang..nak kiss bleh? orang ngantuk nak tdo”

Saya ponk replied gak,

korang tak perlu taw kowt saya replied apa.
Saya panggil skendel saya toh Smarties sebab die neh unpredictable gile.
Semalam die text lagik cakap nak sambung blik. What the fuck sangat!
Naseb baek die comel. Saya usha die agak lama la sebab kitorg jumpa thru a friend of mine. Lepak2 banyak kali gak la and I asked num hp die, saje jek la*haha ye ye jek sajek* Pastu die cakap die da lama usha saya, saya ponk cakap la jugak sebenarnya saya ponk da lama usha awak jugak. Sweet kan?

Muntah sekarang.

Tapi hati saya ada kat orang lain and sekarang saya try nak ambil balik hati saya toh bagi kat die lak. Kalaw tak bleh bagi sume ponk bagi separuh ponk oke lah.

Sebab saya suke Smarties. Seriously.

p.s. Gile tah pape post aku yang neh.Seriously, hormone tak betol 2-3 hari neh. Smarties la yang buat! Saya sayang Smarties.

*It ends tonight*


Why do all good things come to an end?
I was happy.
I was contented.

I tried, yes I did but I failed tremendously.
As I thought I see us, I smirked to the idea.
You gave me goosebumps, yes you were contagious and I liked it.

But where were us?
I was a fool, a total idiot to believe.

I will continue believing tho I know it ends tonight.
Heck it has ended.

But I shall not let these tears fall.
I have grown tired of sobbing and lamenting.

I will wait for you.

p.s.Why oh why? Where did we go wrong?

*Crushin’ hard*

Free fallin’ by Joe Jonas. Original song sung by Tom Petty.

I know Joe does not have the best of voice in the world but he did great covering the song. My heart always skips a beat. Eventho the shrieking screaming sound is tad annoying but please pay no heed to that. Joe sang it with his heart and that somehow jabbed some kind of a majestically romantic ambience that lingers around it, at least that’s what I thought and feel.

Joseph, sing for me please and the world would be ours. Simply ours.

Oh how can I not adore you?

Joseph = Love

p.s. I’m a bad boy.

*little sulky wabbit*


It was the second day of Raya.

I went to his house. I didn’t know what had gotten into me but I was very bold that day. I thought of giving him a surprise visit. You know, being corny and stuff. Typical acad.

However, couple of friends wanted to tag along so I wasn’t all really by myself that day. The thought of seeing him made me hyperventilated. Sometimes I felt so suffocated I couldn’t breathe. But them guys were happy, bantering around and pulling everyone’s legs. I wasn’t. As usual, I put on a fake smile.

He was there, waiting at the door when we arrived. My heart went berserk, impulse beating like crazy. I could’ve sworn my chest would explode. So I stayed a little bit longer in the car, my feet would not want to move. I was sweating like a pig.

Then, I heard the car door being opened. The squeaking sound of the door was dreadful I literally jumped out of my skin. There he was, the face I thought I had lost, emerged through the scorching heat of the sun. His eyes caught mine and I could feel the awkwardness looming between us. He smiled. My heart skipped a beat.

Weyh, masuk laaaaa.

He took my hand and pulled me out of the car. I was dumbfounded, flabbergasted and thunderstruck. My heart had stopped beating. He cuddled me, I didn’t know how to react so I just let him continue cuddling me. I always like being cuddled, I felt so safe. Eyes started to be glooming with tears but I halted myself.

Jom masuk ah, panas la. I said.

It was very vivid while everyone was chattering, our eyes locked each other again. And whenever that happened, he would draw that impish smirk on his face. That somehow was very devastating to see. He always looked very happy.

I got up making my way to the toilet. As I passed through rooms by rooms, the toilet was at the end of the corner, my eyes caught a room that looked so familiar and dear to me. It was his room, I could tell. Even if my eyes were sealed closed, I could tell that was his room. So I went in and it felt surreal, so safe and homely. I used to hang out in the room. Used to. Sigh.

I was about to exit when I noticed something on his desk. Something so treasured, I thought. So I rummaged through the scruffiness on the table to get a better view. There it was a round silver picture frame, with dust all over it. I could see two souls, one was bubbly and the other one was looking so nerdy. The bubbly soul’s hand was put on the nerdy looking one’s shoulder. They seemed so happy. I could see their eyes glittered with glee.

The nerdy looking soul was me. The bubbly one was him.  At the top of the frame, carved a writing spelled ‘MY BESTFRIEND’. Lump started to build in my throat. I flipped the frame backside and that was when I could feel tears streaming down my cheeks. There was some writings too. It was very nostalgic, the phrases.

My sulky wabbit.

Right there and then, somebody was cuddling me from behind. It was him. I was sobbing, weeping like a child. It was excruciating, while people were laughing outside the room, I was crying. He was so stiffed. He always had been stiffed. But he held me tighter as if he could feel the pain I’ve been suppressing within me.

Ko taw ko akan always be my sulky wabbit kan.

I miss us.

I know, aku ponk. Tapi nak buat camne, life goes on. Aku maybe tataw apa yang ko ngah rase sekarang nie, but trust me, you’ll always have me by your side. tak kesah la whatever happened between us.

I’m sorry. I really am. Aku ego masa tu.

Kite dua ego time tu fiq, aku ego gak. Im sorry too. Dah dah, jgn nangis, mama dengar nnti kt luar. Malu dowh.

He turned me to face him and wiped my tears, I was so ashamed. I wished I could be stronger. Fucking crybaby. He kissed my forehead, like he always did during those times. Times when people were jealous of us. Times when we were dubbed as a twin.

Ingat nie… Ko kn BFF aku. Ingat lagik x apa tuh BFF?

Yeah, boy friend forever.

Sssshhhhhh. He made that secretive gesture, smiled and went out.

I slept in his room that night and reminisced the jovial times we had together.  I was embraced by his love. We talked about almost everything. Like we used too, the night where we climbed on the roof top of the garage and gazed at stars. The next day, he boarded the plane to Russia. Another three years before we could finally meet each other again.

By the time I was able to say hello, he’s bidding goodbye.

Why oh why do you have to leave me again, after three years of being hiatus. That dreadful mistake Ive done, it was plain stupid.

p.s. This is not a gay love story. It’s just two best friends who love each other.

*Will you?*

Remember me when I am gone away,
Gone far away into the silent land;
When you can no more hold me by the hand,
Nor I half turn to go, yet turning stay.
Remember me when no more day by day
You tell me of our future that you plann’d:
Only remember me; you understand
It will be late to counsel then or pray.
Yet if you should forget me for a while
And afterwards remember, do not grieve:
For if the darkness and corruption leave
A vestige of the thoughts that once I had,
Better by far you should forget and smile
Than that you should remember and be sad

Remember, by Christina Rossetti

Will you remember me?

p.s. cheer up acad, it’s Raya.

*Days of our lives…*

Are gone baby,

They have perished into thin air where I can easily blow off from my palm.

Got a message from her yesterday, asking for my help. Like always, she will contact me if troubles fall upon her shoulder. Begging for my aid and I would comply docilely. So I helped her, and she said she would gimme a call later at night. Yeah whatever. She didn’t call me tho, in fact she appeared online in her YM. So I waited for her to give me a buzz. Couple of minutes later, she buzz-ed me. Gave her the information she needed. She retrieved it and she muted. So I saw my chance there, so I typed :

Well, just so u know, when someone has helped you, usually he will be thanked for the assistant.

Serve you right! She retaliated by saying I’m going to thank you later dear, coz I still wanna have some conversations with you, you know checking you up yada yada yada. I was cold and bitter to the fact of her oblivious state and looking cute and innocent and such. She gave me this ‘kissing’ emoticon. Ah another chance :

Thanks but no thanks, you can keep it to your current boyfriend, I’m definitely sure he’ll like it.

Serve you twice! Oh she didn’t really get the message yet by saying Oh ok sombong sekarang ngan I, tak per2. Er excuse me, you cheated behind my back and to make matter worst, you stabbed me in the back also. I know it has been eons since that tragedy but the fact that you are still trying to use me kinda pissed me off. Enough is enough. You don’t know how hard for me to let you go, the excruciating pain I had to endure,how much tears I shed for you and your stupid boyfriend or should I say your victim, Fucking heart-breaker. What do you expect sayang? I’m not that daft acad anymore ok.

And we talked, she bragged about her current boyfriend, cute and good looking, fair and such. Duh Like I care, as she was typing, I went outside to the balcony coz I was so tensed and irritated. Leaving her talking to herself. I had come to realize one thing, my heart was beating in a normal rate. Yes! it did. No more wild beats whenever she appeared online like I used to even tho she ditched me. I still have the feeling of falling head over heels for her everytime my mind thinks of her and our memories. But today, my heart reacted normally. And I feel good and rejuvenated.

So I went in and said :

Look babe, we’re over for like 2 years and in case you’ve forgotten, you dumped me. I know we had agree to be friend and such but now I’m too busy to listen to your craps about your new boyfriend. Tak kisah la if die handsome ke, kaya ke, apa ke coz I know ur not going to end up marrying him coz I know you very well ok. So if you don’t mind, I have some dates to catch, and I would rather plunge my head on studying than listening to any of your gibberish talks. Besides, I have other IMPORTANT persons to impress.

I hate you!

She said.And she went offline.

Usually if she uttered the word ‘hate‘, I’ll go berserk and I would try my best to reach her and coax her. If I wouldn’t able to get in touch with her, I can’t shut my eyes, seriously because she meant the world to me (mind the past tense)

Thank you so much. I have long apologized you for your antics. I felt nothing and I liked it so much. Weird hah?

p.s. I can be a bitch too you know, or perhaps even bitch-ier.

*Their Definitions of LOVE*


The Love of Siam.

I’ve changed my mind. I’m not going to review this film. It’s just I can’t seem to find the perfect words  to describe it. This film is just a pure genius and a rare gem.

It has topped my lists of good movies because it surely deserves it. I have watched it two times and I shed my tears both of the times.

This film stands alone in its league for a brilliant Thai movie. It’s just riveting and it would definitely stir some mixed-emotions within you.

It will make you think about the ultimate love of all, and it would evoke the question of we always have a choice, it’s just a matter of choosing the right one. This, I think is the crux of the film.

Well if you have the time with you, do watch it, I personally recommend this.

5 out of 5 stars.